How my Lymphoma made me reinterpret life - part 2
God wanted Masters not followers!
Unfortunately religion stepped in to generate multiple followers with conditioned minds and belief systems.
The Trinity of Body, Soul and Mind was forgotten.
The great design was forgotten and we humans started looking at life piecemeal.
Knowing that time in its vertical capacity might be limited for me, dates, events, relationships, day, night, right, wrong, religion, atheism, good and evil have all lost their significance; I have reinterpreted these terms.
For me today there is nothing which is good, nothing which is bad. Colourful and colourless is how we perceive religion, it is a tool to keep us in fear of God; day and night are time in realm of relativity; my bonds are peripheral souls in this experience together not out of my choice, but because it was designed so.
I am viewing time not as a timeline linearly, rather without any past or future. I am looking at time as this moment, as the here, as the now. For me, yesterdays and tomorrows have all vanished.
When I am not experiencing the multiple side-effects of Chemo, I laugh at this deprecated body. It, as such, never held much significance for me but now it has become a huge source of amusement for me. Physical existence is simply a reaction to so many external factors, it is the creation which is significant! We are the creators! That is what God wanted from us, to become creators and Masters and let go of our experiences as benchmarks for living life. But we end up not letting go and repeating the same mistakes of storing our experiences. I realize today that much of my disease is the result of my reactive life. I have reacted to so many events and situations in my life that I forgot that I was born to be a creator.
I forgot that the people who had been introduced in my life in this journey, were part of a greater design! They were stepping stones to enhance my experience of the greater life, to understand the ways and phenomenon called God. Each experience, which brought joy and sadness, was not actually so. The experience was there, but how I reacted was my will, my creation. And that energy went out to the universe and mobilised it.
The universe listens and the universe obeys and then God just lets it happen! God never says no to us. He/She/It loves us immensely, unconditionally and never judges us.
Thought, word and action-that is how this sequence has been designed! It is simply a thought first, and these thoughts are very powerful. Words are more dense in their texture and acts are much much denser. Words like “can’t handle my life anymore”, whether negative or not, go out in the universe as an affirmation; and it becomes difficult to reverse this energy once it has gone out into the universe.
This then takes the physical form of sickness and I believe only extreme faith can reverse it!
I am understanding a lot of things about the universe; about how a foreign element could infest my body, about why despite being compassionate and living my life purely as per my heart, I still have managed to land up riddled with Cancer!
How my spiritual discipline and sewa (service unto others) could not provide me with an armour.
I am still waiting for the ‘whole’ to reveal itself to me. For this which I am experiencing is not the “whole”. The deep consciousness to the greater design and the insignificance of my existence has yet to arrive! The God phenomenon has yet to unfold fully!
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