The C Word

View Original

A Message to the Daughter I May Never Have

To the daughter I may never have,

I do not yet know

If I’ll ever see your face.

But I can picture you – 

Freckles, glasses

And a little snub nose.

Eyes as wide as a baby doe:

Eager with inquisitive ambition

Ready to let the world take you

To wherever you may go. 

Maybe you’ll have pigtail plaits,

A bob, or Rapunzel locks.

Will you be blonde like I was

Before I washed white, into my gold?

Will your cheeks blush under the summer sun’s stare – 

Or perhaps you’ll be beautifully bronze

Just like my mum.

Are you wise?

Do you like books, or dolls?

Maybe everything is digital now – 

Is your childhood virtual,

Like my adulthood has become?

I hope I can love you

As much as you will deserve.

Treasure you

Cherish you.

I hope I listen well when

You tell me about boys,

Girls...

Or, maybe gender’s a confusing thing.

So we’ll talk about the complexities

Of being in between.

Will we argue?

I almost guarantee it. 

Will you hate me?

Probably

On the day I say:

“Your skirt’s too short,

Don’t take that tone with me”.

But know this,

I’m just trying to protect you

From the men who leer

Out of their car windows,

Leaning on the steering wheel,

Honking the horn,

Shouting their greasy obscenities.

At a girl in a skirt,

Walking to school.

Dear daughter I may never have,

I hope you stand tall.

I hope you stand proud.

Proud to be a woman,

Proud of who you are,

Proud of who I am.

Know it now, tomorrow and forever that

I will always love you,

Even if you never exist.